Naming
July 9, 2009
We
have a basic policy…
Dearest Kin,
… that if people call us what we wished to be called, elves,
pixies, etc., we will refer to they by whatever name they desire.
Or people can call us whatever they wish and we will render unto
them the say service or disservice as the case may be. We have found
that nearly all folks prefer the former to the latter.
Of course, when we speak of the Violynts, the Grymleans, the Goblears
and Meddlers, we are not referring to any organized or self identified
group but rather to individuals (or often not) who are defined by
their behaviors, and it is those behaviors exclusively that keep
them in those categories or free them from such nomenclature. On
the other hand, when we speak of Normals we are referring to a self-identified
group and we’ve derived this name for them from listening to
their own claims about themselves. We’ve repeatedly heard them
say, “I’m so glad I’m normal” or “I’m
just glad my son/daughter turned out to be normal” or “Thank
God, he/she is normal”. The fact that they in turn might call
us Freaks does not bother us at all. We are ever ready to let our
“freak flag fly”.
Nonetheless, occasionally we encounter Elfin Faerie kindred, who
due to compassion, takes issue with us for calling the Normal folk
normals not realizing that 1. We are merely calling them what they
wish to be called and 2. That calling someone a normal only seems
insulting to those of us elfin sorts for whom to be thought normal
would be an insult. However, to the normal folk being thought a
freak or weirdo or even an elf or faerie is tantamount to being
called insane or a social pariah and they’d much rather, and
desperately desire to, be normal. We surely understand and don’t
blame them for this, although in many ways we pity the constraint
this puts upon their lives, their intellect and their creativity.
But as the great elfin psychological theorist Arvyn Flez tells us
there are two essential types of people in the world, those who
prefer social acceptance to freedom and those of us “others”
who always choose freedom over acceptance.
Some have even told us that there is no such thing as a normal person,
that no one is really normal. We will not debate that idea here
for we are not altogether disinclined to agree with this notion,
however, it seems to us somewhat rude to insist that those who wish
so desperately to be considered normal should be denied this desire.
We are, after all, faerie folk and it is our power, right and privilege
often to grant people’s wishes. This wish they have to be considered
normal is such a small wish and while restrictive in our opinion,
is nonetheless a genuine desire and we see no reason to deny them
in such a small and ultimately harmless thing. It would be rather
like trying to take away some toddler’s security blanket, it
merely makes them cry and cling to it all the tighter. On the other
hand, if we let them have what they so desire they may some find
that no longer want it quite so desperately and having been granted
acceptance, by us if by no one else, they will find themselves secure
enough to take a bit of freedom and who knows, perhaps come play
with the elves.
Kyela,
The Silver Elves
